If you saw a Situations Vacant advert for a ‘Cloud Nine Coordinator’ then would you go for it?
These positions don’t come up that often so you need to have your wits about you and be on red alert to put in your application fast.
Cloud Nine Coordinators have to be able to orchestrate euphoria and moments of giddiness so that others feel that they are on top of the world, walking on air, in seventh heaven and all blissed out.
That’s quite an undertaking which is why there are only a select few that can do the job.
This is the sort of job that doesn’t come with any training either so you won’t be able to blag your way in.
You’re expected to have the skills ready to hand and able to transform someone from a mental state of flat lemonade to bursting with joy and fizzing like champagne.
Not only is that exciting, it requires considerable expertise, especially when it comes to sustaining it. This is a specialist position.
Think about it. To take someone from feeling under the weather and elevate them to a Cloud Nine in under a minute takes some doing.
If Cloud Nine Coordinators can prove themselves like this then they can expect to progress to a Cloud Fifteen Superintendent and for the super ambitious then they could even get as far as the top job: a Cloud Thirty-Nine Commander.
If you are interested in the job then you will have to have a lot of first-hand experience of what it is like to be in a Cloud Nine situation.
If you are one of the lucky ones, then you will know that being on Cloud Nine is by defintion to be in high spirits. It’s a feeling of pure bliss where your soul reclines on pillows of Egyptian cotton without a care in the world. You feel all fluffy and the inside of your head does indeed resemble a pure white cumulonimbus.
Being on Cloud Nine is actually quite a cocktail of different emotions. It can mean you are totally stoked, over the moon, all juiced up and beaming. It’s being perfectly content or zoned out in a state of euphoria.
This job isn’t to be confused with a Cloud Eight Coordinator because Cloud Eight is where people end up after drinking too much alcohol.
It’s also not to be confuddled with a Cloud Seven which is where someone will be “as happy as a clam at high water” and that’s quite a different thing altogether.
You might assume that a Cloud Ten is better than a Cloud Nine but it really isn’t. A Cloud Ten is no laughing matter because it is associated with hitting your funny bone. When you’re on Cloud Ten, it’s actually really quite a painful place to be. You know what I mean, it’s that tingling pain that shoots right down your elbow into your hand.
By the way, a Cloud Eleven is the feeling you get when you get a book published. That’s a special one.
We could go on through all the clouds but that would take some considerable time.
So, is a Cloud Nine Coordinator job for you?
Well, you’ve got to show that you are no one hit wonder and that anyone you’ve helped didn’t get there by mistake or good fortune. Most jobs of this calibre require candidates to have at least 100 fully referenced successes to their name. These will be checked!
The question is this though: if you do get the job of a Cloud Nine Coordinator, what cloud will this take you to?
The elation you experience could be off the scale!